Thursday, May 25, 2017

Second Grandson

We did go to the appointment for the second grandson.  He did get the same diagnosis of autism.  His autism is vastly different than his brother's autism.

His mother did agree to try another medication.  He is so aggressive.  She doesn't like medications.  She took medication for help with her Aspergers.  I tried then and tried now to explain it was just a tool to help with the aggression.  I think she is just at the point she is willing to try anything.  He beats on her pretty bad.  She cries.  Then I am upset.

Then she just called me.  She said the younger one's score was 69 and the older's ones score was 62 on the scoring tool the doctor use.  Then she asked me if that meant they both have autism.  I told her yes.

She missed it.  I just don't know what to say or think....

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

The Joys of Grandchildren with Autism

I know it has been a really long time since I posted.  I just sort of ran out of things I wanted to say.  Ran out of things to say about the issues my daughters were and do face... Ran out of things I wanted to say about adults with autism and aspergers.

As life has a way of doing though, things change and remain the same.  I live with the daughter with aspergers.  Well if you want to get technical it depends which one of us you are talking to about who lives with who.  I could maintain the house hold if they left and had this house before she and her family moved it so I stand on that. :-)

Anyway, she moved in with the boyfriend and one child.  With in a few months we found out she was pregnant.  Within a week she delivered son number 2.  (That is a WHOLE nother story. How do you not know until you are in the last week you are pregnant for a second child...)

I had noticed some odd things about the first child.  I quickly was able to zero in on some behaviors as child number two grew.  I kept thinking no.  But yes...

We have the diagnosis of autism for the second son because it was easier to identify the characteristics.  We go to the appointment for the first child which I fully expect to be the same diagnosis for as well.

We have gotten EarlySteps for the first child and now services from the school system.  The second child is in EarlySteps now.  I am using everything I learned.  We are even going to try some new things with the boys.  Particularly since the first grandson is so aggressive.

Who knows?  Maybe I will start blogging again regularly too.  Any grandparents working with adult children and grandchildren with autism spectrum disorders out there?

Wednesday, March 23, 2016

How To Teach Children With Autism

This started out with how to teach my typical child some things he had to learn for school.  It has turned into a pattern if you will to teach my children with Autism Spectrum Disorders.  I keep tweaking it but figured I better get it down while I can.

1.  Talk about it.  What are they supposed to know?  Where is the information?  Did they read it or look at it?  Can they repeat any and all parts of what they know?

2.  Take turns.  Let them be the teacher and ask you questions.  You be the teacher and ask them.  If it is a story role play the important parts.  Act out the things you learn in history.

3.  Tie it to things they know.  Where and when would you use those math facts?  Is there a scene in a movie like what you are learning about in history?  Is there a movie version of a book they are reading in English?  Is it the same or different?  Is there a movie of what they are learning in history?  Is it true or made up?  Which parts?

4.  Is there a visual reminder of some type?  Famous paintings or music that you can attach to the subject?  If it is a social skill can you come up with visual reminders?  Can you write your own story about it?

5.  Is there a game you can use those math skills?  A sport?  How about trivia for science or other subjects?  The ,Are You Smarter than a Third Grader' game?  (Or is it 5th grader?)

6.  Read a book about it.  On a lower grade level if you are reading for information for a school subject.  On a youth level if you are trying to teach a young adult about social skills.

7.  Model behaviors your self.  Later talk to your child about how you did that.

Then do it all again.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

Autism Acceptance

I guess I am having a bad day.  I wonder at the emails I am getting about Light it up blue for Autism Awareness.  If someone has not heard about autism and had the opportunity to look it up I would be amazed.

Autism  has been on every major television station I know of at least once and usually multiple times.  Then articles in newspapers and magazines too.  Student's with autism are  in every school I know about.

I would like to see a month or a day for Autism Acceptance.  That is a lot harder.  It is not that people do not know about it.  People do not know what to do our how to act around someone with Autism.  Then again maybe they do not want to.  

No I refuse to believe that.  I believe most people are basically good.  We as advocates, parents, and individuals with Autism need to help them figure out what to do.

Thursday, July 16, 2015


I am trying to get Dominoe into a routine.  Many routines if I can.  She used to be in a routine at home.  Now that she lives on her own not so much.  One of the routines is to get up, take her medicine, get dressed, wash her face, fix your hair, and clean her nails,

Routines also help her use independent living skills she has learned and needs to learn.  Today we had a discussion about leaving her house and
putting on her make up, fixing her hair, putting on a piece of jewelry, and putting on perfume.

She did have eye make up on.  I wonder where all of her jewelry went though.  I told her I wanted to start seeing some at church before I gave her any more.

Anyway over the years I have noticed routines help with her behavior.  We need to work on that.  I have learned routines are important with people who have Autism.  I need to work harder at remembering.  

Fair Share of Services

My second daughter is an adult with Aspergers.  She does not qualify for Developmental Disability Services.  Well she might if I really pushed the situation.  She would just barely qualify.  So over the years we have gotten her services from the Mental Health system or MHRS.  

She has a case worker that can see her up to 3 hours a week to work on independent living skills and a counselor that sees her one hour every two weeks. Oh and a psychiatrist that she sees once every 3 or 6 months.  It works for her.  

One of the things I pay particular attention to is if the case worker and the counselor actually see her.  They complain that she does not cooperate.  I keep saying if she was cooperative she would not need the help.  And it goes on.  

This is the same daughter who has a son who receives early intervention from EarlySteps.  He is 20 months.  She and I have talked about making sure he gets to see the 'teacher' his one hour every week.  He qualifies for that help and he deserves it is my explanation.  

Well imagine my surprise when she text me last week because she had not seen her worker in a while.  What is more she had called the main office.  She had been told the case worker had a visit with my daughter on her time sheet.  My daughter was hot.  Well in the end, it was a mistake.  

I am more interested in the fact she was worried about getting her fair share of services.  You never know when they are listening.  

Monday, July 13, 2015

Honey Moon Is Over

Here maybe 8 months ago we changed providers.  The former provider had changed supervisors.  Dominoe was unhappy and I was definitely unhappy.  The new provider was working very well.  I just kept telling everyone she was honey mooning.

Of course I was the meddling mother, the never happy mother, and the advocating mother.  But I try not to rock the boat.  So just recently one of the DSWs claims Dominoe hates her job and will not cooperate.  When every my self or the counselor asks her Dominoe loves her job.

I do not live with Dominoe.  She has supports 24/7.   There is no telling what was really going on.  Unfortunately, one day after work the same DSW and Dominoe went by the office.  They were running errands and the DSW stopped to get gas.  Dominoe proceeded to hit the DSW.

When the DSW called the provider office, they told her to bring Dominoe back to them.  Dominoe says the DSW hit her.  In all honesty there is no telling if that is true or not.  Dominoe has learned to lie at 26 years old.  I guess she has also learned that she does not have to do what I tell her too.

Dominoe seems fine with that DSW gone.  I really thought Dominoe liked that one.  I am embarrassed and upset that she hit someone.  Again.   There will have to be an investigation by Adult Protective services again too.

I really do not know how to feel about the whole situation.  Dominoe sees the counselor from the Community (Behavior) Support Team.  I just do not know.  
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