Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Hair and Aspergers

I know I've spoken about this somewhere before.  My daughter with Aspergers hates to brush, comb, or otherwise touch her hair.  The daughter with Autism doesn't like it either but she's a little more tolerant.  I know it's a sensory issue.

But it's her hair for goodness sakes.  It gets so tangled there are balls of tangled hair in the back.  It's not like I can make her take care of her hair.  She is 19 years old and everyone in the world reminds me that she can do as she pleases.  Of course she can.  If she understood consequences that would be a different matter.

We do all the things I tell other mothers to try.  We keep her hair short.  I buy enough detangler that I should have stock in one or two of those companies.  I take her to the beauty shop and let them wash it and style it, a little, when she'll let me.  It just gets so knotted sometimes.

Well at one point the people she lives with, the boyfriend and his family, had some problems with child protection.  It was the mother and her boyfriend's baby.  Anyway during the whole mess, pictures of my daughter, the one with Aspergers hair, ended up in the baby's file with CPS.  They have the baby back.

God forgive me, this last time her hair was a mess I reminded her of it.  I know that's not the major reason the baby was taken away.  My daughter just has to learn at some point that what she does has consequences.

She cried.  I cried.  It took about a week to get all the tangles out but they came out.  I feel horrible.  I'm positive the reason she doesn't get some things is because of the Aspergers.  Tell me I'm not the only one having these type of painful to the bone discussions with their child with Aspergers.  Right??


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